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[May 12th] -- Over the past few weeks, at least two Nationals' blogs went dark, and two others made the move from daily (or almost daily) posting to "as the need arises." Over the past few days, several of my fellow bloggers have admitted that they are finding it difficult to find positive things to write about, that trying to come up with interesting takes on these bad games has made blogging less fun.

And then this happens.

I'm not going to go into any great detail of what happened; we all know the story by now. The Nats tied the game at 1-1 in the 9th, went up 4-1 in the 11th and then lost the game 5-4 when Ken Griffey launched a walk-off home run off of Joey Eischen.

Forget for a moment Nick Johnson's 10th home run of the young season, or Jose Vidro's three hits, or Zach Day's seven inning, seven hit, one run performance. Let's focus on the loss. This wasn't just another loss, it was a loss that left the Nationals' team feeling as if it's living under some kind of voo-doo spell, that no matter what they do, no matter how good they play, bad things are going to happen. They're proving that they are playing under a spell, game after game, after game, after game ....

I'm so glad that I still have final exams to prepare for -- that gives me a good excuse to not write any more tonight. I'm beginning to feel that sense of discomfort that Basil and others have referred to, that no matter how long I sit at my desk, regardless of how many catchy phrases I come up with, none of it is making me particularly happy. Now that we have an owner, and a stadium, and there isn't anything left to wait for, I'm feeling a little down.

And games like this just seem to make it worse.

Yeah, it's difficult to focus on something, I suppose. That's the least of the team's concerns (OBVIOUSLY! ;-), but it's just hard to find an on-field end or angle.

Last season, you had the novelty of it, the great start, the horrific tailspin, the notion that the Nats were still sort of it in (thanks to the Astros and Phils and Mets, etc.) to keep things exciting, all of the dealing and letting guys go, etc. etc.

This season, it feels almost like being a fan of the Royals. Almost. ;-)

Things will get better eventually, and before they get better they'll at least get more interesting.

But right now . . . I don't know. Like I wrote after last night's game, there's no perspective to what I think about the team. It's almost simply a game-by-game endeavor.
I decided a couple of weeks ago, when it finally became obvious to me that the Nats were just going to stink this season, that I would do my best just to take each game on its own. I am trying not to look at the bigger picture of the season they're likely to have because it just depresses me. If they win, I celebrate and look forward to the next game. If they lose, I try to forget it and just look forward to the next game. Either way, the next game is the only thing I'm going to focus on this year.
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